When Grandma Brezec dies, estranged twins Orson and Ursula find out that one of them is adopted! Too bad Grandma couldn’t remember which. Their inheritance at stake, the twins must dig through the family history of legends, lies and sex - with bears. Titillated?
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Fat. Naked. Dangerous.
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Chris got in from Vancouver Wednesday night and yesterday was our first full rehearsal for show. I was looking forward to sharing our breakthroughs, our despairs, our moments of REAL INSIGHT into these characters we've lovingly created. Instead, our day was all about El Trucko here. And it went like this:
8:30 a.m.: Rose discovers that she can't insure El Trucko with her current license, which we'll call her "kiddie license." Foiled!
9:00 a.m.: Chris calls, sounding amazing perky considering the possible jet lag due to three hour time difference. He says he'll be showing up between 10 and 10:30 a.m. Rose promises muffins.
9:59 a.m.: Rose puts pants on.
10:01 a.m.: Chris shows up. There are no muffins. Rose placates him with a cookie.
10:05 a.m.: Rose reveals to Chris the latest chapter in the ongoing "How to insure a BC driver on an Ontario truck" oeuvre. If you're interested, the chapter is entitled "FOILED".
10:07 a.m.: Chris has a brilliant idea. Rose calls the insurance people back to ask if they will insure someone with a temporary Ontario license. They will. SUCCESS! But the insurance people at Rose's bank seem suspicious that she keeps changing her license story. Chris encourages her to hang up before they "trace the call."
10:30 a.m.: Turns out you need your passport to get an Ontario driver's license! Chris has his passport - back at his friend Greg's house.
10:45 a.m.: Chris and Rose witness a man screaming obscenities at the poor TTC ticket booth guy at Wellesley Station. They give crazy Mr. Fuck You a wide berth, because, unlike the TTC guy, Chris and Rose are not surrounded by bullet-proof glass.
11:39 a.m.: Passport obtained!
12:25 p.m.: Government office reached. The wait is surprisingly short, considering it's lunch hour. Chris nearly blacks out from jet lag and low blood sugar, but passes the vision test. Then he gives a jet-lagged, drugged-over grimace when the lady takes his picture. Chris will not be posting the photo here.
1:00 p.m.: Lunch. Sweet, sweet lunch.
2:48 p.m.: Show up at El Trucko's now former owner's house to sign the legal documents. Chris becomes the legal owner of the hippie truck. Former owner suggests that we paint our URL on the back of the truck for our trip. Former owner's baby claps his hands at his mother's brilliant marketing idea. Chris and Rose think it's great too - although when you have your URL on the back of your truck, you can't drive like an asshole. Foiled!
3:30 p.m.: Locate the top half of Chris's costume at the Goodwill Store. Sweet!
3:31 p.m.: Rose is tired and sunburned. Chris expresses his interest in getting his jet-lagged ass into the fetal position. Our heroes part ways for the day. On the way home, Rose stops at the Sev. For the "first rehearsal" Slurpee.
End Day 1.
I know, I know - SCINTILLATING. Sigh. We're hoping that the days to come will be lighter on El Trucko-related drama and heavier on . . . actual drama. Like, you know - the show.
I have got to get a Slurpee Meter going on the side. Until then . . .
Slurpees Consumed: 1
Well, even if they've moved the beer tent, our Edmonton venue is still ACES. It's on the main drag - it's near the ladies shitter and, perhaps most importantly, it's close to my dad's office, in case Chris and I get into any legal trouble.
Sutton Stage 9, Walterdale Playhouse
10322 - 83rd Avenue
Fri, August 18 4:15 PM
Sun, August 20 7:00 PM
Mon, August 21 4:15 PM
Wed, August 23 2:15 PM
Sat, August 26 7:15 PM
Sun, August 27 2:15 PM
